Food for the Brain 3

We cannot, shouldn't wait for things to just happen. We can't think like something's gonna happen anytime now just by sitting around doing nothing. No, nothing's ever gonna happen if we just sit idly. We tend to think that life's gonna give us something good anytime now. That we just have to wait. Trusting fate to do all the work. It's the worst thing we can do. You sitting by the table, sipping your coffee, drumming your lazy little fingers on the table while waiting stupidly and expectantly for a thing that's never gonna come. We have to take action. We must do something to achieve what we want. The only way we can ever get anything we want in life is to work hard for it. Earn it.

Good ol days

 *photos here aren't mine. grabbed them from different sources.

Here's a random fact about me: I love the good ol days.

I love how people before are so engaging with one another. And I mean real human to human contact. Not through computers and internet. There were afternoon teas and parties and dances. Oh, the dances! How I'd like to try those traditional dances wherein you have partners. I also would like to try dressing up in ball gowns and dresses. It's not easy being in those clothes but I'd like to try.

And whatever happened to the gentlemen? Where are they now? It would be nice to have plenty of them in the here and now. Those noble, agreeable and well-mannered gentlemen. Someone to open doors for the lady, someone to give flowers and chocolates and just someone who will treat a lady right. I don't see a lot of them right now. tis sad..

I guess the main reason for why I yearn for the old days is because I've been reading a lot of Jane Austen novels. But still, I'd like to try living in the past.

An Infliction in the Past

I often wonder how other people can talk so easily and confidently to other people. I am not a talker. As much as I can I avoid contact with other people. I'm uncomfortable around them. I don't know why but I get scared around them. This makes me think that maybe there's something wrong with me. I'm shy but I'm sooo shy that I can't even go out to places on my own. I'd want someone to come with me because if I'm all alone then I get scared. Scared of what I don't know. I remember my brother telling me something because of my reluctancy on being on my own. He said, "Why are you scared? They're just human. You treat them as if they're your enemies." He had a point though.

I have a theory as to why I'm like this. The problem is I'm not sure if what happened was real or was just a dream. But come on, why would I dream something like that if it never happened, right? ...right? I don't want to write down what happened. I also don't want to tell my parents. It's hard, embarrassing and infuriating. I don't know if I'm giving too much away but I hope not.

I just wish that I can get over it and change. I want to become a better person. Someone who is worth remembering. Someone who can have an effect on people. Someone who can change lives. Someone who is strong, happy and brave. Someone my parents can be proud of. I just want to be someone who's not scared to face life and be happy.

A Cycle

It's me against the world,

The world against another world,

The world against another person,

Another person against me.

It's a never ending cycle!

Hey..this makes no sense. :)))